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I SAW A SWAN DEAD BY THE TRAINTRACKS AND COULDN'T DO ANYTHING

by Substantial Enough

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1.
Introduction to the Swan 02:19
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Introduction to the swan Am E Am RECORDED I wear, a red hunting cap I am human crap I wallow in disrespect My girl, sleeps with another man I'll write, over three nights. A note to show, I was always right. Mentality derrived from shows and books Father allowed me, off the hook. As if, I cry, it was worth that much. My silly words. Are just a crutch. I'll spend my time with my friends by the shore. Jerome-Dave, Howard and George Cloaked beast boon, smile on the page. Despite her words, I choose to engage. [Music] I trash my strings I dont need them now subtelty is dead, anyhow.
2.
A Boy's Note 02:00
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3.
I liked all your posts, you have to date me. 03:00
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I liked all your posts, you have to date me. E C Bb RECORDED I want to suck the rotted oil from your teeth just to prove you can like and love me my plummeting libido doesnt make me easy to be with thats why i fall for the impossible If I don't grow it's not for you, I'll leave the door closed If it does, and I start to swell I know you'd find me gross I don't not want to hold you, closely it's that when I do I feel guilty Your flesh folds into snow when im around I don't know why so can you help me now heirarchy in the mittens we wear when i cry for you, you just watch and stare It's not even close to my only option, all my friends are queer You know that's me rationalising me wanting you near. You're beyond special and I hardly know who you are I think you're cute and i'd like to start- - to know you and your dreams and ideals I want to know what youd want to feel. I want you to tell me all the deepest things about you Out of our minds on the floor, acid runs through- -our blood as we laugh and dance the night away I want you to tell me why I should stay If you have no words left for that I'll hold you closer, and tell you it's Okay Laaaa dedada Plus I still think Kayleigh is the best.
4.
Inorganic Fuzz Featuring. Misha Hivemind 02:15
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Inorganic Fuzz - CAPO 7 (G D Em C) Entice what is loved with oasis up above An entire band of kazzoos old men with coats brown walk down town and i hope i dont get sued I'm no liar no fraud I only get bored with riffs i make on my own my eyes begin to bleed, the taste of unholy seed like a baby cast out and thrown headed like a tomato, you wont say no organic hair If your eye opens, a single token I wouldnt care is it a kick or am I a prick if i bathe in your musk You make fire with brimstone, jaded testosterone it leaves me a husk (misha hivemind everybody!) If I were a worm would you still love me? would you hold me firm or would you be the early bird Your antenna tastes like pineapple You roll, you roll copper wires in your molars and soul, and soul cup of baking powder control, control I tell you and you roll you roll roll away
5.
COURGETTE ENGINE.WAV 00:37
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COURGETTE ENGINE 3: no chords RECORDED By all I know I am an engine a cog in a machine most foul a death row inmate sobbing sobbing sobbing sobbing I am a human sack of whatever courgette is left my bag is elixiless why am i here i am an engine full of oil i am a jean jacket full of oil Egg oh egg why hatch no yolk? I am an egg without the white, just the part you love but if you were to only eat yolk you wouldnt call me an egg that is why i am i am usless like a sock in a tictac box i am a breathmint on you I am an engine, a cog in a machine that is faceless. why would i know its foul?
6.
EGO DEATH 00:55
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EGO DEATH G A G# RECORDED The walls drip with yellow you The walls twist fuck and screw coccoon of cum and smegma blood is all I can afford a brick wall of seedy place too late to abort firing squad, fuck me firing squad fUCK ME abstract art that entangles my mind cotton balls harder to find sweat drips from the greasy brow i dont even bother to ask how ACID FUCK ME ACID FUCK ME ACID FUCK ACID HOUSE FUCK ME SIDEWAYS I WANT TO WAKE I WANT TO WAKE ACID HOUSE FUCK ME SIDEWAYS I AM EGO DEATH
7.
Heliophobic Recurring Nightmare 01:19
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Heliophobia on a lonely autumn night G A D RECORDED The moon's out clouded by the sky and it's dark out i dont think I can keep going and music is all that helps me breathe it's cold out your warmth doesnt bring my best out you cripple me with glances, knowing your texts are all i can see every word you write every letter that's typed is a square peg in the round hole of my mind im feeling like shite my head isnt right and your smile is leaving me the sun's out im stuck in my bed and i cant work out why i'd ever think you were the one surrounded by cum and I thought you were the one black out another day wasted and my han'ds out id you held it would you regret it i dont want you to answer that question every second i spend trying to separate my repressed desires from the me I hate i could run away tonight and nobody would care i could kill myself tonight and nobody would care it's blue out the blinding white lights hurt as i pass out "You're lucky to be alive, you couldve died" and I really should have.
8.
Is it symbolic for the Motif to die 02:20
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I saw a swan, dead in the reeds. Bugs ate at it, under the pampa leaves Intoxicated flesh scent in the trees I couldnt save it, it couldnt hear my plea It got me thinking of you and I couldnt get my thoughts through this stupid bird had me hung up over someone i barely knew though I hang from the roof like that swan in the lake my feelings for you were never made to be fake and although I think of you day and night My lust for your warmth again isn't right I cant bring myself to cry over your hot cheeks and deep brown hair tears wont change that you're no longer tears wont change that you're not there I'll write songs now to pretend that I impress you with heartfelt lines about a girl i dont even know [instrumental] be happy-im not dead
9.
No Children - Mountain Goats COVER 02:21
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I hope that our few remaining friends Give up on trying to save us I hope we come up with a fail-safe plot To piss off the dumb few that forgave us I hope the fences we mended Fall down beneath their own weight And I hope we hang on past the last exit I hope it's already too late And I hope the junkyard a few blocks from here Someday burns down And I hope the rising black smoke carries me far away And I never come back to this town again In my life, I hope I lie And tell everyone you were a good wife And I hope you die I hope we both die I hope I cut myself shaving tomorrow I hope it bleeds all day long Our friends say it's darkest before the sun rises We're pretty sure they're all wrong I hope it stays dark forever I hope the worst isn't over And I hope you blink before I do I hope I never get sober And I hope when you think of me years down the line You can't find one good thing to say And I'd hope that if I found the strength to walk out You'd stay the hell out of my way I am drowning There is no sign of land You are coming down with me Hand in unlovable hand And I hope you die I hope we both die

about

A delving into the psyche behind an addict of old fiction and misanthropic characters.
Written in a month and recorded in 2 weeks, all in my bedroom.
Substantial Enough Release 1

credits

released September 25, 2022

Thanks to Bope for the incredible art!!
Thanks to Misha and Craig for being features
Thanks to everyone who supported me except craig fuck you craig
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Substantial Enough England, UK

Music shouldn't be good, that's boring. I settle for the path of least resistance. I settle for music that is Substantial Enough.

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